Psychological well-being and social support contribute more to a fulfilling sexual life than does the condition of arthritis. By separating the limitations of pain from sexual self-confidence, you can take a more practical approach to the changes brought about by arthritis.
Plan Ahead for Sex: Keep fatigue or stiffness from getting in the way of pleasurable sexual activity by thinking about the times of day you are likely to be more rested. For instance, if you experience morning stiffness, the afternoon or evening are probably better times for sex. To put you more at ease, consider:
- Napping before sexual activity
- Taking a warm shower or bath or using a heating pad or electric blanket to help ease stiffness and soothe joints and muscles
- Timing pain medication so its maximum effect is during sex
- Using massage to help relax muscles and joints, even as a form of foreplay
- Piling up pillows or rolled sheets to support joints
- Pacing yourself to save energy for you and your partner
Women with arthritis may experience vaginal dryness, making manual stimulation uncomfortable or penetrative sex painful. This can be relieved by water-based lubricating gels. Never use petroleum-based products.
Be Creative and Communicative: Discussing the issue of sex and arthritis may be uncomfortable for you and/or your partner. In some cases, it may even make your doctor uncomfortable to discuss it. Don’t let this discomfort stand in the way of your enjoying a fulfilling sex life despite your arthritis. Consult with your rheumatology provider when you have medical concerns.
Talk openly with your partner to find the positions and techniques that give both of you the most amount of pleasure with the least amount of discomfort. With a little creativity, patience, and planning, individuals affected by arthritis can discover and rediscover the pleasures of sexual intimacy.
Seek Assistance if Desired: Sexual participation is considered an activity of daily living in the scope of occupational therapy. If you would like assistance with problem solving ways to participate in sexual activities without excess pain or stress, an occupational therapist may help you with positioning, pain management, modifying daily routines, fatigue management and more.